No More Scary Stories

I recently had the privilege of being with a very talented group of financial service professionals at the second Succession Planning Roundtable meeting, as they shared their SCARY stories of succession and exit.

Scary?

Yes, very scary. As financial service professionals, they tend to see the good, the bad and a lot of ugly when they work with business owners through major life events. Selling a business to a third party, estate planning, actually leaving the business, turning over the day to day to a son or daughter, are all major life events that if not done well, can have disastrous consequences. Every one of the 30 people in the room had clients who had experienced disaster. We heard about

• A business not properly covered for risk and liability at purchase, creating a costly outcome for the buyer, followed by a lawsuit against the seller.
• Business ownership in the estate plan split evenly between a son running the business and another who is disengaged, owner passes away creating all kinds of issues around business influence, asset value splits, and more.
• Son or daughter not prepared to run the business and owner/father becomes ill. No plans in place to sustain business. Business struggles and nearly goes under.

I could give you a hundred stories. Unfortunately, this group sees them every day.

And yet I marveled as I listened to these very caring, wise, experienced professionals describe the advice they had offered as they anticipated these risks, and the hoops they jumped through to save the client time, money, stress, legal/tax woes, once they were invited in to help.

With these kinds of resources at my fingertips – business attorneys, financial advisors, risk advisors, estate planning attorneys, M&A experts, investment bankers, business brokers and me -- I’m starting a new section of The Donnelly Report bi-weekly newsletter. If you are not a subscriber, click here to register. This section, called ‘Dear Abby’, will answer your most pressing questions about succession and exit. Baby boomer owners will remember Dear Abby. I certainly do! I’ve received many pressing questions over the years because of her legacy. I hope you will write me with questions you have about Succession, Exit, Leadership and Legacy.

Your questions will be handled with the utmost level of confidentiality and with complete anonymity. Email your questions to me. I’ll tap into this razor sharp group of resources and get you an answer.

The Succession Planning Roundtable was started to facilitate networking, relationship building and learning from each other so we can support the massive number of owners that will be exiting their business in the next 15 years. If you want to learn more about this stellar group of professionals at the Succession Planning Roundtable, let me know. Meetings are open to all and are free!

Exiting My Business Shouldn’t Stress My Marriage!

We just celebrated Valentine’s Day, a day known for candy and flowers and romantic dinners. If you’re planning to retire soon, one of the most caring and practical things you can do is to talk to your spouse about the anticipated changes you BOTH will experience when you no longer work 40 – 60 hours/week. We’re not talking about your new-found ability to take off on a Wednesday afternoon to visit with the grandchildren. We’re talking about the everyday changes to your routine. Those are the ones that have the potential to really shake up your relationship.

We think it’s going to be no big deal…sleep in a little, have some time to read the paper over a leisurely breakfast, do a few things around the house, maybe take a nap…. Well, that may sound delightful to you, but your spouse is likely still living the patterns created over years of partnership. Whether your spouse works full time, part time or not at all, his or her patterns will be shaped and influenced by the changes in yours, and if you don’t discuss them in advance, or as they are happening, you will experience tension.

Last August, my husband Jim left his position and is taking some time off to re-evaluate his career direction. This change meant that he (and we) no longer needed to awaken at 5:20am. Yippee! It also meant he would be home. All. Day. Long. I wasn’t sure I liked that.

First, I noticed a subtle (or not so subtle) nudge for a later wake up time – but I still had early meetings scheduled. Later I noticed more meandering in the morning. He took some extra time to play with our dog, eat a leisurely breakfast. I still had deadlines, commitments, schedules -- made months ago -- staring me in the face. When I worked from home, rather than the solitude I had become used to, he would sweetly stop in to say hello or check in with me about what time I’d be breaking for lunch. I found myself distracted by everything -- the music on his iPad, his conversations with our dog, the front door creaking open and shut, open and shut. Arrggghh!

While it took some time, and a lot of conversation and expectations-sharing, we worked things out. I shared my need for quiet time to focus and concentrate; he plays his ipad a little lower. He sends me a text to confirm lunch plans, and I schedule morning meetings a little later. We’ve found a new rhythm.

In Japan, there’s even a recognized condition related to the relationship changes around retirement. “Retired husband syndrome” describes a set of stress-related symptoms and depression that many Japanese women experience in anticipation of having their husbands around more in retirement. This seems to be driving a wave of late-in-life separations, known in the United States as “grey divorce”.*

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

The best approach is to foster awareness of the impact the change will have on you and to discuss each of your wants and needs. Ask your spouse what they want their life to look like in the next 3 years and tell them what you dream about. Then figure out how to make it happen.

* For more information on Grey Divorce from Greensboro, NC experts, contact us  (abby@leadershiplegacygroup.com)

Accelerate Results – Now and in the Future

My early career years were tough. As newly hired entry level managers with Procter & Gamble, we were given tremendous responsibility -- and we were expected to deliver! Most of my colleagues seemed to excel under that pressure. Not me. By about my 5th year with the company, I doubted my ability to reach the next level and I was worn out from the constant struggle to meet the new stretch goals. In year six, I took an opportunity to transfer within the company to a very different role in a different division. In this role, I had the opportunity to work with the senior leaders of the Laundry and Fabric Care business. I facilitated their leadership team meetings, ran the Strategic Planning process, spent much 1-1 time doing what I later learned was ‘Executive Coaching’ and marveling at the discovery through this work, that we all struggle with some level of self-doubt. Some of us are better at masking it than others.

I flourished in this new role and environment. Within a short period of time I was promoted and I started researching my discovery of the impact of negative self-talk and how that manifests in our culture.

A Strengths-based Approach

About that time, there was research coming out, based on work done by Martin Seligman, who is considered the Grandfather of Positive Psychology (University of Pennsylvania). Gallup had recently published Now, Discover Your Strengths (M. Buckingham and D. Clifton), which debunked the myth that our greatest area for growth is in improving our weaknesses. That was fascinating to me!

Instead, our greatest opportunity for growth and delivering exponential results (in addition to greater confidence and true joy) is in working to develop our strengths.

Later, Malcolm Gladwell’s research indicated that it takes 10,000 hours of disciplined practice to achieve greatness in a particular discipline.

Unfortunately, in our culture, it’s easy to stay focused on our weaknesses. We gleefully point out other people’s weaknesses – often not to their face of course, that would be rude! And we confidently put together a list of our own. Some of us willingly share those with others and some prefer self-torture. Many do both. That doesn’t do any good.

What I learned is that you, me, your staff, and everyone else has amazing strengths: skills you’ve built over years of growing your business; qualities and characteristics that are inherent to who you are, that come naturally in special situations and in your everyday life. The thing that makes your performance in those strength areas really special and unique is your willingness and commitment to identify, acknowledge, and develop those very strengths. They don’t become amazing on their own. Look at Michael Jordan, Tiger Woods, and Steve Jobs. They all developed their strengths with hours of disciplined practice. Why not you? If you invest in developing your strengths and your staff’s strengths, you will transform your business, your culture and their lives.

What about weaknesses?

So what if your staff (or even you?) have weaknesses? Should you ignore them? No. Mitigate them. Make their impact on your business and life inconsequential.

Now, if you have an employee in a role where his weaknesses are truly holding him and the company back, you may need to make a change in his role and/or responsibilities or you may ultimately discover he’s not a fit for your company. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t have strengths! It simply means the fit isn’t right. Allocate roles and responsibilities with strengths in mind and you’ll find your results and engagement soar.

Get started:

1. Identify your greatest strengths and then note the ones you most enjoy using. If you are stumped, think about the feedback people consistently give you.
2. Take a look at your team. What strengths do they have that are underdeveloped or underutilized?
3. Invest in an assessment to highlight and validate their strengths. Strengthsfinders is web-based and for $10, you can get a list of your top 5 from their set of strengths . If you want a competency-based leadership or management assessment, contact us for more information.
4. Invest in developing their strengths. Look for ways to re-allocate roles to better align strengths and responsibilities to maximize results.
5. Begin your 10,000 hours of disciplined practice to expand your impact using those strengths. So, if you want to be a better decision-maker, for example, figure out how you can leverage your strengths to do that.

This is a pretty seamless way to get your team engaged and performing at their best, which means your business is on the cusp of something big! I can’t wait to hear what you will accomplish by shifting to a strengths based approach in your business! Drop me a note and let me know how it worked for you!